cristiano ronaldo

Cristiano Ronaldo Gutted Atlético Madrid

Cristiano Ronaldo has a penchant for doing only two or three things in any given game, but those two or three things usually end up being the most important things. That’s exactly what happened today, when Ronaldo scored a hat trick today against Atlético Madrid. His second was the prettiest, when he stared down an…

Report: Text Messages Show Cristiano Ronaldo Knew About Settlement For Rape Allegation

A couple weeks ago, German paper Der Spiegel released a report that claimed Cristiano Ronaldo had settled out of court with an American woman who alleged he raped her in 2009. Ronaldo’s camp issued a strong denunciation of the report, calling it “journalistic fiction” and denying any ties between the settlement…

Referee Blunders Spur On Real Madrid's Murdalization Of Bayern Munich

Real Madrid scored three goals in about 10 rampaging minutes of extra time against 10-man Bayern Munich in the Champions League quarterfinals to win 4-2, and advance to the semifinals, 6-3 on aggregate. And while Bayern blew it and Real made the plays they needed to win it, it’s hard not to come away from the match…

Report: Cristiano Ronaldo Paid $375K To Woman Who Claimed He Raped Her

German news magazine Der Spiegel released a report yesterday saying that Real Madrid star Cristiano Ronaldo reached a $375,000 settlement in 2010 with a woman who alleged he raped her in a Las Vegas hotel. Gestifute, the sports agency that represents Ronaldo, later released a statement calling the report “journalistic…

Cristiano Ronaldo Is Old And Slow And Still The Best

Because of the enduring nature of athletic greatness, it’s often difficult to notice in real time the inevitable fall as the best players slip from amazing to very good to eventually old and bad. The greatest players are great for so long, then begin to peter off so subtlety before the inexorable effects of age eat…

Sculptor Of Cristiano Ronaldo Bust: I, Like Jesus, Can't Please Everyone

If art is supposed to be provocative, to generate questions and discussion and interest, then the bust of Cristiano Ronaldo unveiled outside the airport now named after him was a rousing success, even if it completely failed as an accurate representation of what Ronaldo actually looks like. You know who else was…

Cristiano Ronaldo Honored With Hideous Bust That May Be Imbued With Dark Magic

The eyes! For the love of god, do not look into the eyes!

Man, Cristiano Ronaldo Really Blew This One

Okay, okay, this isn’t quite a gimme goal here that Cristiano Ronaldo just missed. The angle was tough, and he had a lot to focus on with the keeper and defender right on top of him. Still, it was an open net, it would’ve been a hugely important goal in this second leg of Real Madrid’s Champions League tie against…