Totally Unsurprising Development: Russell Okung's Self-Negotiated Contract Didn't Pay Off

Offensive tackle Russell Okung, who signed with the Broncos last offseason, is now a free agent. This is unsurprising, because despite the fact that Okung had a five-year “contract” with the Broncos that was “worth” $53 million, the Broncos faced no financial penalties for cutting him.

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Vikings GM says Adrian Peterson's status not yet decided (Yahoo Sports)

FILE - In this Sunday, Jan. 3, 2016 file photo, Minnesota Vikings' Adrian Peterson warms up before an NFL football game against the Green Bay Packers in Green Bay, Wis. Minnesota Vikings general manager Rick Spielman says Adrian Peterson's status has not been decided, two weeks before the deadline for exercising an option on the running back's contract that would cost the club $18 million in 2017, Thursday, Feb. 23, 2017. (AP Photo/Matt Ludtke, File)

Minnesota Vikings general manager Rick Spielman says Adrian Peterson’s status has not been decided, two weeks before the deadline for exercising an option on the running back’s contract that would cost the club $18 million in 2017. Spielman addressed reporters Thursday for the first time since the Vikings finished 8-8 after a 5-0 start in 2016. Peterson’s hefty hit to the salary cap, which includes a $6 million roster bonus, has made his return uncertain.


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Inflate Your Tires Anywhere With This Tiny, $19 Air Compressor

While it’s certainly not as fast as the coin-operated air compressor at a gas station, this glove box-friendly compressor can save your bacon if you have to change a tire, or just can’t be bothered to find a bunch of quarters. One reviewer describes it as slighlty larger than two decks of playing cards, so you…

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Please No One Tell Joe Scarborough That No One Would Care About His Band If He Weren't On TV

It would absolutely break his heart if you told Morning Joe’s Joe Scarborough that no one would go see his bad band perform if it weren’t for the fact that his real job is hosting a television show, so please, no one tell him.

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This Letter Is Capitalism's Dream And America's Nightmare

One of the many terrifying aspects of having Donald Trump as president is that he, like all children, is very easily persuaded. Single meetings and conversations can shape his entire, pliable worldview. The wolves of corporate America know what easy prey looks like.

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Trump Makes Thirsty Business Asshole Tell Flattering Golf Story

Here’s Day-Glo leatherette Cialis tote Donald Trump, in a meeting with various manufacturing executive types, prodding General Electric CEO Jeffrey Immelt to tell the story of the time Trump boasted about being a rich person who plays golf (probably true) and then hit a hole-in-one on his own golf course (hmmmmm).

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