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It’s not surprising that an artificially-hued, overweight 70-year-old with a terrifying lack of self-control and a noted penchant for fast food doesn’t hit the gym regularly. It somehow is surprising, though, that he has a characteristically smug and preposterous explanation.
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This weekend, Nike set up an event where they declared three athletes would run the world’s fastest marathon. They were amazing athletes, to be sure, but the real news was how Nike controlled every possible condition to give the runners just the tiniest of speed boosts. And some of these are things you can do yourself.
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When it comes to having a corner on the market, nothing really compares to Nike. And right now, they’re having giving you 25% off clearance items with the code 25MORE for both men’s and women’s styles. Check out a bunch of items, from sneakers to running gear, to sweatpants, and hop on that sportswear bandwagon.
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At the beginning of January, I happened upon a video you may have seen: a young woman doing pushups for 100 days. She starts out “scrawny,” but gets stronger. I wanted to do that. So I did, and you can too.
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Congratulations on your resolve to get into the best shape of your life this year. You will fail.
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