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Three years ago, Bastian Schweinsteger was on top of the soccer world. He was starting for the best club and national teams in the world, winning the Champions League for Bayern Munich in 2013 and the World Cup for Germany in 2014. The do-it-all midfielder won eight Bundesliga titles with Bayern and seven DFB-Pokals,…
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A game between Spanish youth sides Alaró and Collerense was interrupted and later canceled yesterday after a bunch of riled up sports parents got into a big brawl. El Confidencial reports that an Alaró player made a hard tackle, which sparked an argument. The argument then roped in a herd of overeager parents, who ran…
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The South African Premier League’s Mohammed Anas won Man of the Match for his two goals in yesterday’s Free State-Cape Town game. Good stuff! Except for his acceptance speech, in which he thanked both his wife and girlfriend (before backtracking to assure his wife that, really, he loves her so much!).
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It’s No. 9 in blue, Fenerbahçe’s Fernandão, that you want to be watching here, even if both he and the keeper he ran into are writhing on the ground following their collision. It’s not exactly a gross injury, but the look of Fernandão’s arm just hanging there—it’s reportedly broken—is pretty disturbing.
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There are only eight teams left standing in the Champions League. This is the stage of the tournament where Europe’s biggest and best clubs (and Leicester City) will battle for ultimate supremacy. And quite the fascinating battle it will be, because the draw is fantastic:
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Manchester United’s Marcos Rojo brought a glimmer of excitement to an otherwise dull afternoon of Europa League soccer by eating a banana. United was up 1-0 over Rostov in the second leg of the round of 16, when Rojo, apparently, felt like he was cramping up and requested a nanner.
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It’s not quite the juiciest quote from Romelu Lukaku’s wide-ranging media session with reporters Tuesday, during which he clarified just how serious his desire is to play for a truly great, title-challenging team—be that at Everton or, more likely, elsewhere—but this response to a question about where he sees himself…
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On Wednesday, U.S. men’s national team coach Bruce Arena announced the roster for the USMNT’s upcoming World Cup qualifiers against Honduras and Panama. There were no huge surprises, except maybe for the inclusion of Clint Dempsey, who recently returned to soccer after being sidelined with an unspecified heart…
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The Foxes were the best English team in the Premier League last year, and apparently they’re the best English team in the Champions League this season. With Manchester City’s 3-1 loss to Monaco today, Leicester fucking City are the final representatives in Europe’s top competition from the Best League in the World™.
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Highly coveted wonderteen and future Ballon d’Or winner Christian Pulisic scored the first goal in Borussia Dortmund’s 3-0 win over Lotte in the German Cup yesterday. The goal itself was fine, the product of Pulisic’s smart movement but mostly Ousmane Dembélé’s unreal skills. But check out Pulisic’s reaction after he…
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That’s Wes Morgan up there leaning into his “Captain Morgan” nickname, peering through a mimed telescope after scoring Leicester City’s opening goal against Sevilla and seeing that indeed, his rowdy bunch of scalawags were right on course to make it to the Champions League quarterfinals.
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If the statement in the headline of this post—Paul Pogba is good—seems ridiculous to you, too trivially obvious to be worth saying, then you’re in luck, because it means you haven’t had your mind numbed by some of the predictably over-the-top criticism he has been subject to since joining the Premier League, the…
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Bruno de Souza is the latest player signed by second-tier Brazilian side Boa Esporte. He’s made his name tending goal for prominent Brazilian teams like Flamengo and Atlético Mineiro—and also for being sentenced in 2013 to 22 years in prison after he was found guilty of arranging the murder of Eliza Samudio, his…
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Nothing—not losing, not winning, and certainly not cascading jeers from fans of his former club—will stop Jose Mourinho from talking heaps of trash. The man simply cannot help himself. On Monday, the fighting words came after Manchester United’s 1-0 loss to Chelsea in the FA Cup quarterfinal, during which Chelsea…
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Early on in this video, you’ll think you have some understanding of just how insane the action got during Sunday’s Gama-Brasiliense soccer match in Brazil. But then you’ll get to the part where a few fans take a break from a punchy tug-of-war to strip another fan of all his clothes, save his underwear, while kicking…
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Sergio Ramos has a magical forehead imbued with the power to score clutch goals. This head of his brings unending joy to Real Madrid fans, despair to opponents and rivals, and is arguably the most valuable body part in Madrid this side of Cristiano Ronaldo’s priceless right leg.
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José Mourinho thinks he deserves credit for Chelsea’s success this season. You can tell that this is true because he has said the exact opposite.
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There are no Liga MX games this weekend, as officials for the Mexican soccer league have gone on strike to protest a series of recent threats from players.
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Serie A leaders Juventus went 11 points clear today after they escaped with a 2-1 victory over Milan, thanks to a last-minute handball penalty called on Milan’s Mattia De Sciglio.
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If you’d like to see what the sentence “Oh my god, this is the coolest thing that has ever happened to me!” looks like when played out in real life, this Russian kid’s reaction to seeing José Mourinho in the tunnel before yesterday’s Rostov-Manchester United match will do the trick:
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It’s been nearly an entire day and it’s still hard to believe that what happened yesterday actually happened. (Six to one!!!!!!) Relive some of the insanity of the Sergi Roberto goal that capped off Barcelona’s incredible Champions League comeback against Paris Saint-Germain with calls of the moment from across the…
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The most revelatory story that emerged before today’s Barcelona-PSG Champions League rematch was a funny little nugget about Barcelona’s outsized confidence in their impending victory.
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Borussia Dortmund lost 1-0 to Benfica in Lisbon, Portugal two weeks ago, necessitating a strong performance today in the second leg of their Round of 16 Champions League tie to advance. They needn’t worry, because the wonderteen was there.
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France took a 2-0 lead against the United States Women’s National Team into halftime tonight without having to do much besides let Eugénie Le Sommer run at the USWNT’s center backs and let them fall over themselves to give her easy paths to goal. It started in the seventh minute, when Allie Long got turned into a…
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Welp, it was fun while it lasted. Despite putting together a lively first-half display, the last vestiges of what little hope Arsenal had of beating Bayern Munich by a huge margin died in this sequence of events early in the second half:
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Atlanta’s new MLS team made its debut on Sunday, losing to the New York Red Bulls 2-1 in front of 55,000 new fans. Some fans cheered the team on and enjoyed themselves, some fans continued to engage in embarrassing “football” cosplay, and some fans got homophobic.
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